blessings Self...all praise is due for you...whether you are behind the lines, in between, or in the bullseye, a public enemy for belief, for being in the way...
...our destinies are tied, whether u support trump or bernie or clinton...whether they are the people they say they are or you perceive them to be...our destinies are tied and we need dialogue...more than words...understanding...compassion...
...ALLAH, the Essence, the One-ness, the Infinite is constantly providing signs..."if only you would see," the qur'an exhorts...
...my ears are packed with wax, the plastic kind found in mock hives meant to capture bees into bondage for hobbies, sales, retail...i....often forget...listening to the pied pipers tunes of babylon ecstatic...mesmerized by a moment in sensory stimulation and falling into your scene, seen, science...
...my science, the one i've come to embrace, when i came into this path of Surrendering to the Source of Peace (islam), as an adult, is as old is dust...watches the new world claims of european "discoverers" and "inventors" like a grandfather, hand on his cane, looking over a valley at children stealing chips and samosas from the chai shop...i see you...my arms are open to you...my warmth extends to you...
...you must need love, reassurance, if you need me and everyone else to recognize you for what you believe to be your accomplishments...to be reassured that you invented it, that you were the first, that you conquered mt everest and invented the equation of action reaction as we were told newton accomplished in grade school...
...i believed you...before i looked at the lessons written on the lines of my parents face, which read karma in vedic sanskrit, which read inna illahe wa inna illahe rajun, as clear as the scrolls of hieroglyphics containing the geometrics that aligned pyramids with stars, like cell phones and towers...
...every so often, i forget Truth, and give into this new world of discovery, watching youtube hit sensation personalities who walk around with the camera eye and think maybe this is the way...maybe the new world discoverers, now that they are also yellow, red, and black and brown like me, and ethnicities, now that they speak with dialect and twang and swag, are what it is. i think. for a second. even though i watch the faces of former ancestral dust like lestat in anne rice's the vampire lestat, men and women, adolescents, who were once human, now vampires...yet, they look the same, yet they look like me...
...selfies, me me me, mirrors and stage light. applause.
forgot prayer last night, even after breaking fast, even after a day of aligning in body to the science, in getting weak in this uniform, and strong in You, in One...but then others, then social, society, food, and forgot...the very thing that the fast reminds me is ephemeral suddenly took center stage with the 3rd, 4th, 5th bite...
...and very shortly after, reminded...reminded in the empty in the crowd today, in the letters missing from the mailbox, in the place of a familiar hollow...before, and after the nap...
...a few days ago was a strawberry moon, off in the distance, shining days before, so pregnant that i thought it was full for days, that it was fully on the opposite side of the sun, behind the earth, 28 days after the last time....
...a full moon and the apex of the earth's proximity to the sun. close. so close we could burn...so close we could disintegrate and become...
...moment of pause...moment for intentions...
...this full moon i let go of lofty, of descriptors, and metamorphosize the videos that will help you and me grow in compassion to our bodies and others bodies, and the universal body...this full moon, i let go of repeating the pattern of staying in the shadows of appearances, of what will you and they think if it doesn't come out right, of what if i'm wrong, by allowing myself to share this Love of traditional medicine with the world, doing it because its important and will help, and support, and will be an exchange of currency...this full moon i let go of unilateral exchange...the sun and earth are in a mutual alliance, both engaged in gravitational pull, in work...i can no longer offer what i do for nothing as i have and my father has...we will have to exchange energy that respects both of us...
...in letting go of unilateral, i let go of control, and ask you, require both of us to participate, to have meaningful exchange; this requires me to let go of perfection and do, and see what happens, and learn along the way from interacting with you, Self...
...letting go of safety, of the security of the shadows, of perfection...
...,doing the show,
and seeing clients for nutrition and herbs,
and speaking to you with candid and compassion,
and getting you gifts for eid when its eid,
and cooking for you,
and giving you massage,
and open armed to what ever you have to say, to your critiques, cause i can only grow...
see you on youtube...see you at the mobile herbal, nutrition clinic,
see you at the restaurant i will be chefing at,
and see you at the yoga class i will be teaching...
looking forward to You Self...
